I’ve often wondered if Einstein had a flair for fashion. Not in an eighties kind of way, that would be too bizarre, but more in a minimalistic, “efficiency is the future” way. Alright, so why would this even enter my mind? I think because I read somewhere that Einstein kept a cupboard of the exact same suits and clothing for every day of the week. This was supposedly because it would mean less time deciding what to wear. Come to think of it, that’s just genius!
Having married a woman in uniform for all the right reasons and of course the associated mile high club benefits, I am well aware of the relief that comes with not having to decide what to wear. It seems the whole, “what not to wear” thing is quite a business. Television shows, books and even the occasional disapproving stare from the ladies club at the local library should convince you that clothing and fashion are a key factor in personal success. I’ve always said it’s more important to look good than know anything. This is particularly true if you are unashamedly stupid. You see, nobody likes a poorly dressed idiot! However, an idiot who can keep their mouth shut but dress like there’s no tomorrow is quite forgiveable.
Just ask Paris Hilton. Now that’s hot! Paris has such a strong following of new mode junkies who will try just about anything to grab some fame. Even ugly dogs normally relegated to snake bait, are being spared as a fashion accessory. I tried that once with my little white rat and a silkworm, but it didn’t last long, and my teacher simply put his foot down, squashing my big hopes of a classroom fashion revolution.
So here I am wondering how I can turn my Einsteinish fashion stock into the new uber-sexual, mile-high dress code, that’s hot, flashy not trashy style of the future. Just a few more years and my eighties pants will be back in. I can feel it!